31 Thoughts of a UK Student During Finals Week


  1. I need more sleep.
  2. 8 a.m. finals were designed by Satan himself.
  3. The library is kind of fun right now. Everyone’s so social! Everyone I know is here!
  4. Okay, the library was a terrible idea. I can’t get anything done. Everyone shut up. Please.
  5. It’s already midnight?? I’ve spent 4 hours watching cat videos and browsing Twitter! Okay, I need to focus. #Focused.
  6. Coffee.
  7. Should I drag my butt back home for an hour and a half of sleep, or just stick it out and pull an all-nighter?
  8. It’s go time. Better review my notes.
  9. I smell like I pulled an all-nighter. I might as well be wearing cologne called “Starbucks, Procrastination and Shame.”
  10. Oh God. I’m not ready. There’s no way I’m ready.
  11. Coffee.
  12. Please tell me I remembered my #2 pencil.
  13. That Ovid’s breakfast is not sitting well on my stomach. Please, God, don’t let my stomach make awkward trumpet sounds during this final.
  14. I’m sweating. Why am I sweating?
  15. I wonder if the professor thinks I’m cheating. He keeps looking over here.
  16. I really think he thinks I’m cheating. Probably because I’m wearing this ball cap. Cheaters wear ball caps to hide their cheating little eyes.
  17. Maybe I should take off this hat.
  18. Be quiet, stomach! Do you have to gurgle RIGHT NOW?
  19. Coffee.
  20. Can’t. Focus. What’s the square root of x? What’s the square root of x?
  22. Why is that guy looking at me? I don’t know the answer, either.
  23. I think I saw him on Tinder. Right swipe for sure.
  24. That girl curled her hair and did her makeup for this final. So much judgment.
  26. How am I supposed to focus if the person in front me keeps tapping his foot at a million miles an hour?
  27. Last question. I made it. I’m crossing the finish line. There might as well be a cheering crowd of adoring fans, photographers flashing, music blaring . . . taking home the gold, baby.
  28. Wait.
  29. I think I skipped a question. Does this mean all my bubbles on the Scantron are OFF BY ONE? This is my nightmare. I’m going to die.
  30. Close call. Done with 15 seconds left. I’m going to go home and sleep until I’m declared legally in a coma.
  31. Coffee.



Photo credit: keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk


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